I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
