i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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