it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Are we still banned from the library?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
