Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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