I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
She said her name was "party"
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
