i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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