is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
