There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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