I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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