Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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