so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
