I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
