I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize
