Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
