the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
