she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
