Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
