He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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