Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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