there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
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