I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
