For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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