I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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