apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
