my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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