I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
