I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I'm both gender and math confused
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
