The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
