White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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