You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
