..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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