i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
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