nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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