I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I wish there were birth control emojis
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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