the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
The best revenge is premature balding
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
