She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Randomize
