I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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