More tranny stories later!
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
zippers are such a cool invention
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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