Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
