so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
