I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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