physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
