I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize
