It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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