just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
