I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
