Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
