Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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