I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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