I think i sorta joined a cult last night
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Randomize
